IPod Shuffle SantanaOC
by Inuyashagirl2015
Summary: My second IPod shuffle. This one is femslash or yuri, whatever you wanna call it. Santana/OC (OFC). Rated M, just to be safe


I cheat on these. Like, hardcore. The song usually plays a couple times over before I go on to the next one. Just saying

Pairing: SantanaFemOC(Dragon, as usual)

Universe: Glee(Not sure when in the show it is, Probably sometime around Nationals, though I don't think its gonna matter for most of them)

Warnings: Sexual references and situations (though no actual sex), swearing, references to underage drinking, bullying, self-harm, possible suicide references

Rating: M

1. Song: The New Girl In Town by Whoever Wrote The Music In Hairspray - Dragon

"Isn't it too late to switch schools Freshman?" A voice asked me suddenly. I jumped in suprise, as I hadn't heard the door open and I knew for a fact that this bathroom had been empty when I had gone in here to get away from stares of strangers who were probably wondering why I had transfered to a new school in _November, _and my cousin who was asking the same thing.

I spun rapidly to face the owner of the voice. It was a girl, a few inches taller than me, probably hispanic with a perfect heart shaped face and rich dark brown hai, almost but not quite black. She would have been the prettiest girl I had ever seen, except for the fact that she was looking at me like she would probably look at a bug on the wall, which totally ruined it. She was also wearing a cheerleading uniform, but as far I had seen, that was pretty much a normal cheerleader thing to do.

I was pretty sure this was Santana Lopez, 17 years old (two years older than me)and a Junior, my cousin had told me about her. And about how she was a lesbian and they were using eachother to make themselves seem straight.

"Can I help you?" I raised an eyebrow at her, ignoring her earlier comment about switching schools so late in the first semester.

"Yes, you can." She took menacing a step towards me. I automatically took a step back. She took another step forward, so once again I took a step back. She continued to prowl forward another few steps, but when I tried to step backwards, I realised that I could retreat no longer as the sink was pressing none-to-gently against my lower back.

"Your Karofsky's cousin right. He told me that he told you about me." She took half a step more, so that we were almost but not quite touching, and she down glowered at me as I leaned back a little, not wanting to back down, but not at all comfortable with someone this close.

"If you tell anyone about me, I mean anyone, and I will make sure you regret the day you decided to move to Lima Ohio. Got it Freshman?" She growled at me. I could only nod as I stared up at her with wide eyes.

"Good." She replied, spinning and walking away from me towards the door. Just before she left, a thought occured to me and I couldn't help but voice it.

"Besides, if I did, I'd be the biggest hypocrite in Ohio." She paused with her hand on the door, and slowly turned around.

She raised an eyebrow at me, wondering if I was serious. Then her moved downward, and it took a lot of willpower to not shiver at the attention. Then she smirked at me, and I knew I had passed "inspection" as it were.

"Then I guess I'll see you around New Girl." Then she strutted of the bathroom. I was unable to move from my spot pressed against the sink for a very long time.

2. Song: Next Contestant by Nickelback - Dragon

'Why the hell did I agree to come here? She wouldn't have come if I had asked her not to' I wondered as I glared at the stupid jock, murder clearly in my eyes. 'She knew very well she would get hit on by absolutely all of the drunk males. Why can't they just get it through their thick heads that she _taken? (_The unhelpful little voice in my head told me that it was because she was taken by a _girl_, which I promptly told to _shut the fuck up.)_

Santana glanced toward me, eyes locking immediately, and she smirked. Why, god, _why _did I have to fall in love with a girl who absolutely loves to make me jealous? (Even though I knew that she would never cheat on me, that wasn't the point.)

She said something, probably something flirty, to the oblivious jock, who didn't realise that she wasn't even looking at him when she was spoke. He must have taken it as an invitation, however, as within seconds he was on the couch beside her, not quite touching her, though it was a close thing. He took a swig of his drink as I continued glare at him while he, obviously competely wasted judging by how he had stumbled walking over to her, remained oblivious.

I waited only a few more seconds for the part where I drew the line. Then it happened. The asshole put his hand on her leg and whispered(I knew very well how this phrase_ looked _when spoken or whispered, though I couldn't hear it as the music was very loud), "_You wanna go upstairs with me?" _That was the last straw(as usual).

I slammed the nearly full red solo cup of some random alcoholic beverage on the table next to me and sprung up from couch, startling the two people who had been making out next to me. Santana's smirk grew epically as I stormed across the room towards them, trying to murder the guy with my eyes as I drew closer.

I stopped a foot away and put on my sweetest smile.

"That wouldn't happen to be your hand, is it?" I asked sweetly to the guy. He smiled sloppily at me and said "Yeah, why, you want me to move it?" Probably thinking I wanted his hand on _me, _he pulled it back. Ugh, _gag._

"Oh no, of course not." My smile widened ever more, "In fact, I wish you would put it back, because then I get to _tear it off!"_ I snarled the last part, my smile turning into a viscious baring of teeth. He cursed in fright and jerked up from the couch and stumbled into the crowd and away from us, my smirk matching her's as I watched him leave, then promptly took his place on the couch.

"Have I ever told you you're hot when you're jealous?" Her arm slid around my shoulder and pulled me closer to her.

"Several times, actually." I responded, before she pressed her lips to mine ferociously as she pulled me onto her lap and wrapped her arms possessively around my waist.

'Oh yeah, that's why I came,' I thought as she shoved her tongue into my mouth, 'These parties always lead to hot make out sessions and equally hot sex when we get to my house.'

3. Song: Hurt by Nine Inch Nails - Santana

The blood in the sink was the first thing Santana's eyes were drawn to. She followed the trailed of blood up to the razor, still held with a hand, frozen in shock, against a pale wrist, just seconds away from drawing more of the red liquid. She followed the trail until it stopped at pale, umarred skin and followed the line of her arm up until she locked gazes with the tearful gaze. The razor clattered to the floor the second their gazes met as the pale girl collapsed into a sobbing heap on the floor. Coach Sylvester would have a fit about the blood on her uniform but she found that at the moment, she honest couldn't care less.

At this point, that simply didn't matter.

4 Song: Breakdown by Breaking Benjamin - Dragon

I was in shock. Of course, I knew what had just happened, I had seen it happen a hundred times in the few months that I had been here, I had helped nearly all the other Glee members (Kurt more than anyone else) clean it off of their face and clothes, and I had been expecting it since Monday when we came out as a couple, and yet I still couldn't quite believe that I'd actually just had a slushie thrown in my face. Slushie Facials, they were called. How disgustingly fitting.

"Oh hell no, they did not just just slushie Santana Lopez and her girlfriend!" A tiny part of me was touched that I was included in her reason for outrage. "I'm going to kick their stupid fucking asses!" I _almost _let her go do it, but I couldn't quite bring myself to relax my grip on her hand.

"Dragon-" She stopped, probably about to tell me to let go, until she saw my face, my eyes wide open but blank in shock, my face also blank except for the fact that my mouth was slightly open in suprise "... Are you okay baby?" She asked me quietly with more care than I had ever expected to see on her face and in her voice when I had first met her- I guess it was a good thing that there wasn't anyone else left in the hallway, as it would have ruined her badass reputation... After a moment, I closed my mouth and slowly shook my head, though my face was still absolutely blank.

"Come on." She tugged at my hand gently and I followed mechanically as she led me to the nearest bathroom.

I was kind of spaced out, but the next thing I know, she had already wiped the gunk off of both of our faces and she's talking to me again.

"Come on babe, talk to me. We both knew that this would happen sooner or later." I finally spoke up,

"I know, its just..." Its just what? I have no fucking idea.

"I know babe, but you're gonna have to get used to it." She chided me, "It's gonna start happening pretty often now that they've done it once and gotten away with it."

"I know, I know," I sighed, "This town is gonna make me have a breakdown."

"I know baby, I know, you're not the only one." She wrapped her arms around me, offering silent comfort and murmered a promise of protection into my forhead.

And when seven of the hockey players didn't show up for school the next three days, I wasn't too terribly surprised.

_5. Song: So This Is Love by Walt Disney From The Movie Cinderella - Santana

So_ this _is requited love. Well, I can see why everyone makes such a big deal about it. I had thought that they were all crazy when I had been in love with Brittany, it hadn't felt this great. In fact, it had hurt- a lot. To know that she loved me, but that she loved someone else more? Torture.

But this... This was amazing, the feeling of loving and being loved back, especially by _her. _It was amazing. She was amazing. I stared into her beautiful eyes. which looked back up at me reverently, as if I was the most important person in the world to her. And, not to seem egotistical or anything, but I think that I actually _am _the most important thing in the world to her. But that's okay, because she is the most important thing in the world for me.

I had never expected to fall in love with her, when I first started dating her. I mean, she was just rebound from Brittany, and I had thought her even more pathetic because of the fact that she _knew _that she was the rebound, but she didn't seem to mind. How wrong was I? She cared, a lot, in fact, she literally almost killed herself because of it, but she still thought that it would be better to have me and know that I wanted someone else than to not have me at all. She loved me long before I loved her back, and it makes my chest ache to think that she must have felt, because of me, how I used to feel because of Brittany.

But she didn't have to feel that way anymore, because now I wasn't just with her because I wanted to hurt Brittany, now I was with her because I wanted to be with her. Because I love her.

Yep, that's right, I, Santana Lopez, Queen Bee Bitch of Lima High, was in love Dragon Angelius, and she loved me back.

So this is love.

_So this is love..._

And fuck you guys, yes, we _are _in lesbians together.

6. Song: Over And Over by Three Days Grace(this one takes place before # 5, if you can't figure that out) - Dragon

I love her, really I do, but she'll never love me back. I try so hard to stop, and sometimes, I can even make myself love just a little less by replaying every cruel thing she has ever said or done to me or anyone else in my head, when I'm at home alone for hours, but then I'll see her the next day at school, and I suddenly I realise that I really didn't make the feelings go away in the slightest.

I feel it every day, all the time, whether she's there or not, and I keep chasing after her, but all it does is push her farther away from me. I can feel her disgust when I speak to her, she thinks I'm absolutely pathetic, and I can't blame her, I mean, I am, aren't I? She had never tried to make me feel anything positive towards her, but I just keep crawling back to her, no matter how many times she pushes me away.

I know that my love and my obsession with her are unhealthy. I realised that as soon as I realised how much I loved her. I know what' best for me, but I would rather have her, even if she won't have me. I'll just keep wasting my time, my health, and my life hoping that, just once, she would show _me _some affection, that she would care for me just a fraction of what she does for Brittany.

I hate Brittany. How can she not realise how blessed she is to be loved by Santana? How dare she reject her and hurt her so much.

Santana doesn't think I realise, but I know that I'm nothing more than a rebound. She using me, hoping that Brittany will get jealous and leave Artie for her. The worst part is that, when she asked me out, she made it perfectly clear that I was just a replacement, but I still said yes without even hesitating. I mean, its better to sort of have her and know that every kiss and every carress she gives me is meant for someone else, than to not have her at all, right?

But eventually, this _will _destroy me. I can already feel it taking its toll on me. It doesn't show on the outside when she's around, She doesn't like me personally, and she would drop me altogether if I started to look anything less than perfect and sexy around her, but when she's not around, that's when it shows. I look altogether exausted, emotionally and physically, utterly defeated, and sometimes almost _dead._

That's what scares me the most. If this continues, I know that Santana and this love _will_ kill me eventually, or, more specifically, make me kill myself.

And the worst part is that I love her anyway

7. Song: A Whole knew World by Walt Disney from Aladdin - Santana

It was amazing, seeing how excited she got about the little things. The mall, the movies, dinner, every single thing was exciting and fun and awesome to her. Her enthusiasm was so innocent and childlike, it made me want to laugh and go back to childhood with her.

The best part, though, was when we went to the park. By that time, it was very, very late and there was no one else in the park. I was just planning on going on a walk with her, but then we saw that the playground was completely deserted and, well... It just seemed like something we simply had to do. So, we played on it as if we were little kids again... except little kids typically don't steal kisses in between the monkey bars and the slide, as far as I know.

8. Song: Call Of The Zombie by Rob Zombie - Santana

It took Santana eight months of knowing her, six of dating her and two of being in love with her to realise that her girlfriend could be completely and utterly _creepy _sometimes.

Currently, said girlfriend was watching the screen with childish delight and saying perfectly along with the creepy asian girl in a creepy little girl voice, _"Play with me..." _And accenting the sentence with a _very _creepy giggle.

Right now, Santana wasn't totally sure whether or not she was still glad she was staying the night at her house or not.

9. Song: Animal by Nickelback - Santana

I drove towards the railroad tracks, my girlfriend having just jumped inside my car as I drove by her house.

"You know," She murmered thoughtfully into my ear, "You look so hot right now." Her hands brushed ever so slightly against the crotch of my jeans. My breath hitched just a bit, but I don't think she noticed... Or maybe she did...

"I want you so badly right now." She whispered into my ear as her hand undid the button and the fly of my pant in one smooth, quick motion. The car swerved a bit and her hand stilled halfway down my pants. Horny though she may be, she wasn't stupid and she didn't have a death wish.

I quickly got the vehicle back under control, and just as quickly, she continued with what she was doing. We nearly crashed about seven times before we finally arrived at our destination.

Just before we got there, Dragon slipped out of her seat and into the back of the tiny red sports car and I made sure not to look at her in the rear-view mirror as I would probably either crash or orgasm (or both) then and there.

However, the second I turned the car off, I whirled around in my seat to face her and nearly lost it then and there at the sight that I was met with.

"Santana, why don't you come back here with me." She gave me a sweet and innocent smile that totally contradicted her current position. In this state, there's very little truly innocent about her.

10. Song: Good Enough by Evanescense - Dragon

I'm not good enough for her. I know that, though I seem to be the only one to realise. But I can't end it, even though technically it's probably whats best for her. What can I say, I'm a selfish, horrid human being, and I'm totally and completely in love with her(not to mention she loves me back).

My love for her... May not not be clinically _healthy, _for me, anyway. I'm serious, I cannot say no to her. It's not that I'm a pushover, it's just that I litterally _cannot _say that two letter word to her. I promise you that if she asked for my literal heart, it would probably be sitting in her hand, bleeding and still beating, within seconds.

I really shouldn't have let myself fall so totally in love with her that I would let her totally and completely conquer me, but I did, and I really don't regret anything.

However... I am waiting for something bad to happen, or myself to screw it up. That's what always happens, and what might happen with this, because I don't know how to hold on to anything this wonderful and amazing.

One day, she'll realise how disgusting I am. How weak and frail I am, and how she doesn't want _used goods, _and that I'm just a worthless, pathetic waste of space.

One day, she'll stop loving me.

I know that that day will come. Of course, I've been told that I'm thinking to lowly of myself, but I just think I'm being realistic. I have a plane load of emotional baggage, I'm over sensitive and I'm undeniably emotionally dependent and clingy. She deserves so much better than me, and one day, she's gonna realise that.

When she does, I won't ask her to stay. I won't ask her to accept my baggage. I won't ask her to continue to love me. I won't ask for any of that before she realises it either. I really only have one request that I feel I can make of her.

'Be careful what you ask of me, because I can't say no.'

For the record, yes I did just edit it, so it sucks less than it originally did. Hope that made it enjoyable for you, my lovelies!


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